Dress for Remarried Moment

tigerly1 says:
I am getting remarried in Sept 2011, it is going to be a church service and I have asked 4 people to be bridesmaids. I have one adult and 3 children aged 8 & 9.
I am unsure as to whether to dress them all the same / go long or short/ carry flowers or not.
I am on a budget ( in common with most people at the moment) and considered having dresses made but locally I cant find a dressmaker who is within my price range, they are charging around £80 per dress!!
Any ideas / help would be welcomed.
Thanks

The Answer:
Its not for everyone but have you thought about second hand dresses as you can pick up some great bargains and most are in great condition? You would only need to get them altered then if they dont fit quite right. I know several people who picked up dresses off places like ebay.

Divorce

How to get divorce after judicial separation is granted? I had been granted for Judicial separation in July2007. Almost 1year & 9months had passed. How can I proceed for getting divorce now. Is there any provision according to Indian Law that I get the Divorce by Default, as it has been long time after getting the Separation Orders?

Ani says:

What state are you in? I know in Victoria you can apply straight through the family court. There's a fee to pay then you get given a hearing date. If there are no children involved and/or no property to divide then you don't even have to attend the hearing. They'll just send you the paperwork in the mail once it's done. I know as I went through this a couple of years ago.

Renewing vows Kinda second wedding?

Hi ladies,

DH and i are renewing our vows on our 5th annivesary April 16th 2011 as we have had a rocky patch and completed our family as we have 4 children who are now 12 7 5 and 3 after DD i had my tubes tied, im 28 and hubby 29 we are looking for any advice on how anyone had run or been to a renal, we not doing all the formal bits like having a celebrant do the ceromnoy as we still have the vowes and run sheet from our wedding wwe are taking bits from that and having my best friend along side with our children do the servies so to speak.

We will have formal clothing not a wedding dress but a nice long dress have hired a house in coolum qld for a week so we can have a mini honeymoon/family holiday going to have a buffet style dinner with colse family and friends that have been on our roller coaster with us as we found when we got married the 1st time we invited everyone we thought we had to LOL

So any advice tips or thought would be helpful

thanks girls x

Vin says:

Planning ahead of time is the best..Just make sure all your plans will be materialize...Good luck!

Things you would do differently second time around?

Soon I'll be starting to plan my second wedding, and I intend on it being a lot less stress free than the first one. I recall after the first wedding wondering why I stressed so much on the details when the day is over in the blink of an eye! As long as my guests get a good meal, yummy cake and I have a gorgeous dress I don't care about much else I had a big wedding last time and I haven't seen a lot of the guests since the wedding itself in 2004!

This time will be completely different, and I'm telling you girls this so that when I start my planning and I'm posting on here more hopefully you can all keep me in line

Nancy says:

Well, the first thing I'd do differently woud have to be a different groom (unless it was a vow renewal )

I can't really say for myself cos I'm not married yet, and I'd do everything the same if I was going to start planning again, but my friend has been married twice and I was BM both times.

For the first wedding:

The bride and groom were 19 and 20. The BM's picked the dresses and the colour and the wedding theme was planned around the dresses we picked. The ceremony was at the school chapel, the reception at a nice hotel in town. There were about 120 guests, half family, half school friends, some of who were there for the free booze and spent time bagging the groom (who was the one who had invited them) out cos they thought he was a bit of a loser, but weren't going to say no to a wedding invitation. There was also one guest (brides side) who as we were walking out of the chapel said that she and her BF weren't going to the reception because they were going to a Blink 182 (or something similar) concert. It was a fabulous day and a wonderful ceremony and reception, but I think that most of the guests were a bit young and not all there for the right reasons.

Second wedding:

The bride and groom were 26 and 32. They organised everything as a team (except for her dress). They had even picked out the suits and dresses in the specific colour before they askd us to be part of the bridal party. They were chilled out and relaxed tho, even tho they had things well planned. When they told us they were engaged, we were expecting something a little more low key and casual, but the ceremony (full nuptual mass) was at the Cathedral (where they worshipped) complete with organ, full choir and the bells. It was a beautiful, touching ceremony that was just so them. It was a late afternoon ceremony, so we had some quick photos and then headed off to the reception at a hotel just out of town. There were 80 guess (6 tables of family / fmily friends) and 2 tables of friends. Everyone was there for the right reasons (to celebrate their relationship).

Although more elaborate, the second wedding was more personalised and more them. There was also that feeling of love (rather than lust) in the air the entire time they were around. All of the guests were people they either see regularly (whenever they’re back here) or are family and only don’t see because they live overseas.

All in all, it did surprise me a bit at the start that they had gone with such an elaborate wedding, but even though it was her second (his first) wedding, it was THEIR first wedding and they made it exactly how they wanted. As the planning went on, I kicked myself for my first thoughts because the entire lead up and day were just perfect for them. It’s still one of the most beautiful days that I’ve had a chance to be a part of.

Keith says:

My first wedding was when I was 25 and was in a church with about 80 guests, quite an expensive day but the parents paid for most of it so that was ok. I remember it being a bit stressful for everyone with so much attention to detail and worrying alot about the guests being happy etc.

Second wedding, was much happier and stress free, a smaller wedding which we both wanted, about 30 guests with the ceremony by the river. Just our closest friends and relatives (as opposed to every single person you know) made it much more personal and manageable. And with the children involved it was very special indeed. Cost heaps less - and even had it in a different state! The parents still chipped in too, how cool is that!

So probably wouldn't have changed much at the time, I think I just changed and this is what suited me much better at the time

Keith

My son is giving me away

I am so happy! My 19 year old took my leaving my EXH very very hard and has been very loyal to his father and for the last 3 years the road has been very up and down between my son and I and he does not speak to my FH . However I told him I was getting married next year and his sister (18) is being bridemaids. I asked him if he would like to give me away and he told me to let him think about it after a couple of weeks yesterday he told me he will give me away! Im just so happy this is a HUGE step for him and hopefully a new begining for us! He has also told me he would like to be our music man on the night!!! I cant wait until March now!!!!

Andrea says:

That's fantastic Haze, it's good that he is coming round and wants to be part of your special day.

Nancy says:

I am so happy for you haze. It must have been difficult for you, having your son keep his distance from your new man. I hope this is the beginning of a strong friendship between the two of them.

Lancy says:

That's really fantastic. I am sure even if your son didn't say it directly that he is happy for you. I really can feel the love between the both of you. It's something new, right, being given away by your son and not your dad..

Betty says:

im so happy for you that is fantastic news!

Sounds like you have a smart daughter there too lol good on her

Telling ex you are engaged

Haven't done it and cant seem to. We have a six year old together and of course HE knows...lol...he even wrote about it in his school work book..."on the weekend my mum..." luckily/unluckily? ex doesn't look at this and...lol...besides with the spelling M6 used it is difficult to figure what he wrote...lol! thing is...thought ex's GF would notice large (oooh so beautiful!!!) sparkle on ring finger...seeing as tho she notices most things...but alas no!!! guess it is just a matter of saying it but there never seems to be right time and as we SMS mostly to communicate...can go for weeks without seeing him.

Anita says:

I called mine and told him after all my family knew and before the wider "friend" community found out.

He was really happy for me and glad I called him to let him know. It was just out of courtesy really that I let him know. I felt a little nervous and silly doing it but it was over in a minute and didn't hurt a bit!!

We didn't have kids together though, so you are in a slightly different situation to me.

Just bite the bullet and call him before your little one spills the beans.

Nanda says:

I haven't bothered to tell my ex...he doesn't have a phone and I don't have his address...but he was an abusive $hit so it's not relevant to tell him anything.

But the sooner you do it the sooner it's done and you can get on with enjoying being engaged and planning your wedding

Stella says:

depends on what sort of relationship you guys have i think. My ex husband and i dont talk at all anymore, causes more stress than its worth to be honest. Our daughter told him as she talks a mile a minute about anything. I think maybe if your little boy has it in his homework book than he probably has passed on this info too

I always feel that this stuff is none of his business now anyway, he always manages to stick sarcasim and nastiness to everything anyway. So unless you guys have the sort of relationship that is still really friendly then i wouldn't probably pass on too much personal info anyway.